John Thornton Makes Me Cry

In Elizabeth Gaskell's North and South, John Thornton asks Margaret Hale to marry him and is stunned and hurt by her angry rejection: "He took up his hat. 'One word more. You look as if you thought it tainted you to be loved by me. . .I have never loved any woman before. My life has been too busy, my thoughts too much absorbed with other things. Now I love and will love. But do not be afraid of too much expression on my part.'

Margaret, changing her whole tone and bearing to a most womanly softness, said 'Mr. Thornton, don't let us go on making each other angry. Pray don't!' He took no notice of her words. . .smoothing the nap of his hat for half a minute or so; and then, rejecting her offered hand, and making as if he did not see her grave look of regret, he turned abruptly away, and left the room. Margaret caught one glance at his face before he went. . .she thought she had seen the gleam of unshed tears in his eyes and that turned her proud dislike into something different and kinder, if nearly as painful--self reproach for having caused such mortification to any one." pp 128-9 North and South

Yes, John Thornton makes me cry even now as I type this passage. I've read and re-read this novel over the last couple of years, watched the 2004 BBC adaptation of the story many times, and seen interviews and fan videos of North and South. Without fail, this story of the "antagonistic friendship" turned romance between John Thornton, the northern cotton manufacturer, and Margaret, the southern clergyman's daughter, always touches my heart.

Fun Monday assignment: I've been thinking about this post for a long time and now Mariposa, our host for this week, over at Mariposa Tells gives me the opportunity to write this ode to North and South. Mariposa wants us to talk about TEARS--what images spring to mind when we think about crying? Sadness? Joy? Laughter? Well, truth be told, in real life I'm more apt to swear than cry. But the human stories I experience from good writing, drama, or music will always cause the tears to well up in me. Caution: I may "overestimate" your interest in 1800s English literature and drama so just take what you like from this post--the story itself, the interesting interviews with the actors, the memorable characters, or the beautiful fan videos. I have just been wanting to collect all this background in one place. So, here you have all things North and South:

North and South is the story of light and darkness, have and have nots, class wars, pride and prejudices. But mostly it is the story of several principled people who begin their relationships by mistrusting and misunderstanding each other. These rough beginnings evolve into friendships across class divides, appreciation for different ways of living, respect for worthy adversaries. It is the story of parents' love for their sons and daughters. Most of all it is the love story of John Thornton and Margaret Hale--one that began with strong dislike on her part that changed to great respect for him, especially when she saw the great lengths he would go to protect her reputation, even after she rejected him, for a rumored indiscretion that threatened her reputation in Milton.

Characters and setting: first we have The Southerners: Reverend Hale, his wife,daughter Margaret and son Frederick. Reverend Hale was a parson of a small parish in the village of Helstone, Hampshire. The village was an idyllic place for the Hales--green, sunlit, rose-covered parsonage. The parson and his family were much loved by the villagers. Margaret spent much of her childhood in London society with her Aunt Shaw, but came home to Helstone to help with her father's work when 19 years old. Frederick,joined the navy as a young man and ended up in a mutiny against a deranged sea captain. He was forced to flee to Spain to avoid capture and hanging for the mutiny. The Hales had not seen Frederick for many years.

Mr. Hale decides he can no longer, in good conscience, continue to support the teachings of the Church of England. He becomes a Dissenter, deciding to leave his parish and move the family north to the industrial town Milton where he will find work as a teacher. Neither Mrs. Hale nor Margaret want to move, fearing that they will not be able to live in a place so different from their beloved Helstone.

The Northeners in Milton: John Thornton is a young wealthy cotton manufacturer at Malborough Mill. He has a reputation for being a progressive mill owner, a tough but fair master to his workers. Thornton's chief ally and business adviser, is his mother, Hannah Thornton. Mrs. Thornton is fiercely proud of her son and his accomplishments. When John was 16 years old, his father speculated in some risky dealings causing the family to lose everything and then he committed suicide. John left school and he and his mother and sister Fanny lived a bare bones existence, putting aside money each week to repay the creditors long after they had forgotten the debt. At their first meeting, Mrs. Thornton told Margaret and Mrs. Hale this about her son: "Go where you will, the name of John Thornton, manufacturer and magistrate, is respected by all men of business and sought after by all young women of Milton." Margaret got off on the wrong foot with Mrs. Thornton by responding: "Surely not all of them?"

The other Northener that's central to the story is Nicholas Higgins, a mill worker and union organizer. He is known by all the mill owners as a man to be feared, a terrific firebrand. He meets Margaret when she first arrives in Milton. He admires her "bonny face" and spirit and appreciates her friendship with his daughters Bessy and Mary. The relationship among the Hales, Higgins and Thorntons is a tangled one that eventually evolves into a mutually beneficial business relationship and friendship, but not before they are almost destroyed by a strike at all the Milton mills. Higgins does a great favor to Thornton by clearing up a misunderstanding that Thornton holds against Margaret--making way for them to pursue their love for each other.

The two years that the Hales spend in Milton are hard. Margaret writes to her cousin Edith: "I am so lonely. It is so cold and harsh here. Everywhere there is conflict and unkindness. I have seen hell and it is white--snow white." (speaking of the cotton fluff that floats in the air in the mills). The Hales live in reduced circumstances. Mr. Hale teaches at the local lyceum and also takes on private students. John Thornton is his prized pupil. They spend many evenings studying the classics--that is, when John can take his eyes off Margaret! Mrs. Hale soon becomes gravely ill. Out in Milton, the mill workers go on strike, led by Nicholas Higgins. Children starve. Margaret sympathizes with the workers which puts her in conflict with the Thorntons. Death comes to the Hale and Higgens' households. Margaret and Thornton clash regularly even as the attraction builds between them. Margaret's reputation is damaged by secretly getting her brother Frederick home to visit their dying mother. There is trouble involving Frederick and Margaret, but she cannot tell Thornton about the visit. As the local magistrate, Thornton intercedes on Margaret's behalf in a police investigation even though he is tortured by Margaret's rumored unmaidenly behavior.

Against this background of social and labor unrest, Gaskell plays out the love/hate relationship between Thornton and Margaret. He loves her because in many ways she is like his mother--stern, principled, proud. When John is troubled or in need of advice he goes to his mother, Hannah Thornton. She does not approve of his attachment to Margaret, but urges him to go to her and make his case because she believes Margaret would make him happy. When Margaret rejects him, this proud young man kneels by his mother's chair begging for comfort. He says: "I was right mother, Miss Hale will not have me. No one loves me but you." This fan video, "Tears of an Angel" is a beautiful description of Thornton's feelings for the two women in his life:


In addition to the music videos I also found this interview with Richard Armitage who played John Thornton and Daniela-Denby Ashe who played Margaret Hale in the BBC adaptation. This interview was so interesting because you get to hear how they worked together. And they were so well suited for the characters as Gaskell described them in the novel. Plus, Richard Armitage always has such an in depth, intelligent approach to the characters he plays. As a bonus, I wanted you to see the rail station scene at the end of the film. I've seen many fan videos of this scene. No wonder Richard became the new Darcy--what a kisser!


Finally, this fan video featuring the music of Clifford Ward, "The Best is Yet to Come" perfectly sums up the twists and turns in Margaret and Thornton's relationship. I especially love the last scene when they are sitting close together on the train heading back to Milton. Each is lost in thoughts of their future together--a happy one.


I'm amazed if you're still reading at this point. You get the prize for endurance. I'm happy to have all these North and South favs collected in one spot. If you haven't read the book or seen the film, I highly recommend them. And, if you've got a romantic bone in your body, John Thornton will make you cry happy and sad tears at some point in the story.

Now be sure to check out the other Fun Monday crybabies over at Mariposa's place!

Summer Escape to Sherwood Forest

(How are we spending the lazy hazy days of summer? That's Janis' question over at Life According to Jan and Jer , our host for this week's Fun Monday. She asks us to share favorite outdoor activities and ways we keep cool in the summer heat and humidity. Frankly, I despise and complain about summer weather from May to September. But, never fear, thanks to Netflix I can regularly escape to Sherwood Forest where it's always cool and exciting.)

Okay, to be totally honest I would never have thought about watching this BBC series which puts a modern spin on the legend of Robin Hood if it
were not for him. Yes, the lovely and brilliant English actor Richard Armitage plays Sir Guy of Gisborne, a major villain in the series. RA totally won me over playing John Thornton, the smouldering northern cotton manufacturer in the 2004 BBC 1850s costume drama North and South. So, I was happy to follow him to Sherwood Forest(actually filmed in old growth forest near Budapest, Hungary)to see him play the chief thug and enforcer for the evil Sheriff of Nottingham.

First a little stage and character setting: Series 1 opens with a boyish Robin of Locksley just returning to his estate from five years fighting the Crusades in the East with King Richard I for the rights of Christian pilgrims to journey to Jerusalem. When he arrives home accompanied by his freed manservant Much, Robin finds that his estate has been usurped by Guy of Gisborne under the new Sheriff of Nottingham's authority. Even worse, the old sheriff, Sir Edward, and his daughter Lady Marian have been driven out of Nottingham by this new sheriff. Villagers around Nottinghamshire were being systematically plundered, terrorized, starved, and taxed by the Sheriff to build his treasure chest and finance a rebellion against King Richard while he is away from England fighting in the Holy Land.

Robin's Hood: Robin returns from the Crusades weary of bloodshed and suffering from what we now call post traumatic stress disorder. He sees how his people are suffering under the new sheriff and immediately begins to challenge his authority. Since Guy of Gisborne has claimed his estate, he and Much retreat to Sherwood Forest, emerging to help the villagers and rattle the sheriff and Guy. In the forest he and Much are attacked by another band of outlaws and end up banding together to fight for the villagers. In this photo you have, as they called themselves Robin Hood, from the left: Robin Hood (Jonas Armstrong), Much, Little John, Will Scarlett and Allan A Dale.

Notice the costumes. No green leotards, tunics and feathered caps here. The Hood's look is kind of an Old Navy meets grunge, don't you think? Guy is into black leather at all times except that one time when we see him bare chested in the fire light trying on new armour. :-) The sheriff is kind of Versace meets drag queen. And then there's Marian with her modern hair cuts--one at the hands of the sheriff in the public square as a punishment for defying him--, braided bodices, riding pants, and Night Watchman's cape and mask. Very cool.

The Love Triangle-- the most interesting twist to this telling of the Robin Hood legend. Robin and Marian were sweethearts before Robin went Crusading. He was interested and pleased to see that Marian was still unmarried when he returned. However, Marian was not so impressed with him. She had been doing much of what Robin wanted to do on his return--feeding the poor, running interference for the villagers, masquerading as the Night Watchman delivering food and medicine to the poor. She thinks Robin is immature and a showoff. But she is attracted to him and wants to use her position as a lady to wrangle information out of the sheriff's camp--to be the spy for the people and help him.

And then there's Guy. What Robin has, he wants, especially a woman with the status of Sir Edward's daughter. At first Guy's efforts to win Marian repulses her ("Guy is sniffing around me like a spaniel" she tells Robin). Then she realizes that she can use Guy in a variety of ways, so she launches her charm offensive. As the story develops, Marian becomes much more to Guy than a status symbol. His love for her and jealousy of Robin Hood begin to unravel him, especially when he wants to protect her from the sheriff and she resists. In some of the publicity for the series, it was written that women under 30 were in love with Robin Hood and the over 30s were wild for Guy of Gisborne. You'll understand if you watch the series! This was funny also: apparently a young male fan wrote a review where he complained of too much "snogging" going on for his 13 year old tastes. . .

In order for you to fully appreciate exactly how much pure escapism and fun to be had from watching Robin Hood, here's a very short video trailer for Season 1:



BBC just showed the last of Season 3 in June. So far we can get the first two seasons on DVD or Netflix rental. Although the last two seasons get much darker, Robin Hood is truly entertainment for the whole family. There's plenty of archery, riding, sword fights and other high jinks. Very little bloodshed is shown, even when villagers are getting their tongues cut out for not ratting on Robin! There's really subtle humor that adults would appreciate. And there's surprising parallel to modern events--crooked politicians, excessive taxation, war in the Middle East and damaged soldiers trying to fit in back home, greed, lust for power and suspicion of other cultures. And then there's Marian, Robin and Guy--who will win the lady in the end? So, if you're still looking for a summer's escape I highly recommend heading to Sherwood Forest with the Hood!

Be sure to check out Janis' place for some other summer past times--perhaps a little closer to home.
(Photo Credits: RichardArmitageOnLine.com)

Bryan and Mutt

Like big brown friendly dogs with black snouts? Like Bryan Adams ballads? Well, look what I found this morning when wasting time trolling YouTube. Enjoy and you're welcome.

Harem Cookout

(Celebrating independence is the theme for this week's Fun Monday. Grace, our host over at Mama Rehema's , asks us to share how we observe our country's Independence Day. That's July 4th in the U.S. This year was a special one, a Cookout for the Harem, prepared by the Sultan himself.)

On the right is the Grilling Sultan, called Laddio in less formal situations. He has just recently upgraded his deck and was most eager to entertain his harem of six middle-aged women with a patriotic cookout. His chief assistant is Hallie the Pit Bull and sister of my own boy Willie. In the photo above Hallie is checking to be sure everyone will have their drinks of choice properly iced down.

Sally, the Number One Wife, is the only married member of this group of long time friends. Therefore, she very generously shares the Sultan with her friends--we call ourselves Laddio's Harem. He takes us out to dinner and on rare occasions is loaned out to "screw" for us--that is, putting up window boxes, curtain rods, etc. Here's the benevolent Sultan relaxing with his harem while the brats and burgers grill. As you can see, he enjoys his role:
How lucky we are in these friendships of over 30 years. All started by working for the same company for all these years. I'm the late-comer to this group and that was over 20 years ago. When we're together, I look at each of them and wonder how we've stayed friends for so long. We are so different. There's Z the social animal, J the witty and smart geek squad, S the hard-working romantic and Sally my heart friend and partner in many adventures. We don't necessarily share the same interests. In fact, sometimes we don't even understand what the other is talking about, but there's a glue that melds us together. It's is the experiences of a lifetime--work, relationships, family joys and troubles, illness, dog love, adventures.

So Friday night we sat out on the deck until almost 10:30 pm. We ate brats and burgers with all the trimmings prepared by our Sultan. And, after some trial and error and much needed direction from Hallie on how to get the ice cream maker cranking, we finished off the evening with homemade strawberry ice cream under the summer's night sky.

After I got home I read the ending to the last work of the Irish journalist and writer, Nuala O'Faolain, before her untimely death in 2008. In Best Love, Rosie Nuala writes of the challenges of late middle-age and how many of our support systems fail us in our later years. One thing we can always count on though is friendship in its many forms. Here's what Rose sees in her motley crew of friends at her own birthday celebration:

"The breeze was blowing the hair on all five heads in the same direction--so that you'd think, to look at them, that they belonged together: that they were all in the same little gang. But I knew how many hesitations there were between them--and between me and them. And it made me like them even more: that I knew how every one of them found it hard to get life right, and still they were willing to make a celebration, still they were generous. . .Yet I was moved by our middle-aged selves much more than if we had been young. It seemed a wonderful thing that we had come out of our separate lives and gathered on the top of a ridge for no reason but that we were friends." p. 368, Best Love, Rosie by Nuala O'Faolain

So, there you have it, Grace. My independence day celebration--good food, friends and a reminder of how precious the role played by each of these people in my middle-aged life. Now be sure to check out other Fun Monday celebrations. I suspect they'll be similar to mine.

Fashion vs Practicality

(What are you packin'? As a purse or wallet, that is. Our host for this week's Fun Monday is The Church Lady over at Living Life in Pa . Church Lady wants to see a photo of our purse/wallet and, if not too incriminating, wants a description of the contents. Well, I'm packin' practical,but longing for high fashion.)


The SAK Silverlake Leather Convertible Satchel in persimmon is what I'm longing for. First, I love this color and it would look great with my default wardrobe color choices of mostly black and brown. Like the way the bag conforms to your side when you wear it over the shoulder. The leather looks buttery soft. The braided handles and zipper pulls are nice touches. The straps make the bag look very sporty and about town. Very fashionable and fun accessory to have for everyday. It could be mine for around $100.

Chances are that I won't be getting this purse, though. Here's the thing. When you're retired, this kind of purse is just not practical--at least for my lifestyle. A good week for me is one where I don't have to leave the house except to do a few errands and take in a movie. For my week, a persimmon satchel would just be overkill. So, instead I use this common sense black microfiber Baggallini that is just large enough to hold what I need to leave home. I've had this purse for many years and liked carrying it to work because I could tuck it into a tote bag with all my take home work. If I went out for lunch, I could just take the purse. Here's what I carry in this handy 8 x 6 in. wallet on a string:

Starting in the lower right hand corner and going counter clockwise: 1. keys for my retirement car, a Toyota Scion xB, my little "breadbox on wheels"; 2. a plastic baggie for "sister fixing"--I take care of my older sister's business since she's housebound so, this bag contains cash, lists, receipts, meds prescriptions so I can get her situated when I go out; 3. reporter's notebook with a running grocery/errands list--remember the goal is to limit the number of times I have to pull the car out of the driveway per week; 4.cash and plastic; 5. Origins lip gloss in natural and raspberry, eyeglass cleaners, and Colgate wisps disposable toothbrushes; 6. watch--stopped wearing one every day since retiring; 7. cell phone and a love/hate relationship with it; 8. Altoid minis, checkbook, and ticket stub to latest movie-- "Easy Virtue",very stylish adaptation of Noel Coward play starring Colin Firth who does a mean tango :-).

Finally, the Baggalini is the only purse I carry for travel. The rule is that you only take two pieces of luggage, especially for international travel. First, there's a duffel bag with wheels that gets checked. Then all my in-flight supplies and "toys" go in a backpack so I can move about hands free to deal with security, take photos, etc. The Baggalini goes in my backpack and is large enough to hold passport, cash, maps, and camera if I want to travel lightly when going out in the evening. This particular pile of stuff was what I needed for a European trip last year. As you can see, I was ready for all contingencies!

Now be sure to get over to The Church Lady's place and check out other Fun Monday purses. "Isn't that special?"

Summer Soup, Cornbread & Coca Cola Cake

(Our host for this week's Fun Monday, M the Misanthrope ,has handed us a proverbial piece of cake with this week's assignment. She wants us to describe our all-time guilt free main course and dessert. What glorious food would we love to eat at any time without worrying about calories, fat grams, cholesterol, carbs or points--or whatever our most important dietary measure may be? Well, great minds! Last week I had actually made my favorite main course, and as I tucked the leftovers away in the fridge was thinking that if I had to choose one food to eat all the time, it would be this one.)

Main Course--Summer Vegetable Soup with Cornbread

I've written frequently about the huge vegetable gardens my family raised when I was growing up. We needed to grow enough vegetables to feed the family from early spring through the fall with enough left over to can and freeze for the winter. By mid-summer our garden would be bursting with tomatoes, green beans,cabbage, corn, carrots, potatoes, green and hot peppers, and peas. Time to get out the biggest pot--usually a canner--and make Garden Vegetable Soup. This was not fancy food. My mother would just chop up all these vegetables at one time and fill the pot with water and let everything simmer together for several hours. No meat, broth, herbs or spices were needed. What she ended up with was pure vegetable essence in a bowl.

In the south the side for vegetable soup has to be cornbread. It must be made from a coarse ground white cornmeal, buttermilk and bacon grease. Absolutely no eggs or sugar went into our version of the southern bread. The cornbread had to be baked in a well-seasoned cast iron skillet so that you'd get this deep brown crust and the "pone" could be turned out on a plate. The plate was passed around and everyone broke off a piece of southern deliciousness--no cut wedges at our table.

Dessert--Southern Coca Cola Cake



My recipe for this southern classic is written on a blue spattered index card and I've used the same recipe for over 40 years. You'll find the recipe in most of the church, women's and homemaker's cookbooks that are common in the south. It is much loved for its simple ingredients, ease of preparation, moist texture. But it's the frosting that keeps the fans coming! Think crackly soft chocolate fudge bumpy with pecans and coconut, poured over the cake while still warm. The star ingredient is Coca Cola in both the cake and frosting, the southern classic drink invented by an Atlanta druggist in 1886.

Here's the recipe: Coca Cola Cake

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease 13x9 pan with butter, dust lightly with cocoa powder.
2. Combine 2 C flour, 2 C sugar
3. Heat to boiling: 2 sticks butter, 3 T cocoa, 1 C coca cola
4. Pour over dry ingredients
5. Add 1/2 C buttermilk, 2 large eggs, 1 tsp. soda, 1 tsp. vanilla, 1&1/2 C miniature marshmallows.
6. Bake for 45-50 min. Cool slightly and frost.

Frosting
1. Heat to boiling: 1 stick butter, 1-2 T cocoa, 6 T Cola
2. Pour over 1 box confectioner's sugar. Beat until smooth.
3. Add: 1/2 C coconut, 1/2 C chopped pecans, 1 tsp. vanilla
4. Pour over cake. Frosting will set as it cools.

So, there you have it, Ms. M. Garden Vegetable Soup, Cornbread and Coca Cola Cake would be my dream guilt free menu any time of the year. And, I just have to mention this. All my dogs LOVE vegetable soup, too. They enjoy theirs over dry kibble, not with cornbread! Now scoot over to The Misanthrope's place to find out what everyone else craves.

(Photo credits: all from google. The cake is from Road Food.)

Wednesday with Oprah, Understanding Columbine

Today my July issue of The Oprah Magazine came in the mail with Oprah peeping out from behind this bright yellow book cover. This is her annual summer reading issue that highlights a collection of good reads. See Summer Reading 25 Books You Can't Put Down for this year's recommendations for fiction, nonfiction and poetry. Perfect timing! This weekend I was planning to share my friend KittyHawk's story of attending an Oprah show taping in Chicago to promote one of the books that's featured at #7 on the summer reading list--Columbine by Dave Cullen.


Most of us think we understand what happened on April 20,1999, at Columbine High School near Littleton, Colorado. Around lunchtime, two teenage boys, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, entered the school where they were soon to graduate, intent on killing the maximum number of students, teachers, and school administrators and staff and destroying the school with bombs and guns. Their plan was to carry out an attack that would top any other event, even the Oklahoma City bombing. We remember the grainy videos of the two weirdly dressed killers moving through the school coldly and deliberately trying to maximize their body count. We listened to "experts" try to explain why two apparently normal teenagers would want to carry out such a diabolical attack against their schoolmates. They hated and felt wronged by other students, especially athletes, evangelicals, and adults in authority? They were a part of a goth-like group, The Trench Coat Mafia, who wanted to punish the mainstream?

Dave Cullen, who was on the scene as a journalist from day one of the attack, has spent the past ten years refuting the myths surrounding Columbine. On his Columbine webpage Cullen says that he wanted to answer two questions by writing this book: 1. what drove these killers? 2. what did they do to their town? By the time I finished reading Columbine, I thought that he had answered these questions. The answers will astound you, especially the motivations of the killers. His reporting should change the way school personnel, law enforcement, and even parents monitor teenage behavior, maintain vigilance and intervene before teens go into such a downward spiral that they can't see any way out. As to the second question, the effects on the people of Littleton, Cullen tells the story of the victims, the survivors, the students and teachers who had to return to the scene of horror, the parents who wanted justice and remembrance, the church leaders who chose either to heal or capitalize on the tragedy, and the investigative team that did its best when many were plainly out of their league, and the media which didn't always get its facts straight before reporting, especially when they were trying to meet the demands of 24 hour a day reporting.

A great strength of this book is that Cullen tells the story without inserting himself in it. This is a real talent. I had no idea until I read the chapter notes at the end of the book exactly how much access he had to the principals in the story. He did the interviews, read the reports, consulted the experts, attended the public meetings and church services. He truly understood what the Columbine massacre and its aftermath had done to the town. He reported the facts and left his own feelings out of the narrative. That demonstrated great respect for his readers. Columbine was published in April and debuted at #7 on the New York Times bestseller list for non-fiction (it rose to #3 and now, after nine weeks on the list, is at #21). The style of writing and compelling subject makes it a great read any time of the year.

Part 2 KittyHawk and Wednesday with Oprah

(Photo--Kate Battan, Dave Cullen, Oprah) I learned about Columbine from my longtime friend, KittyHawk. She has been friends with the author Dave Cullen for several years and collaborated with him on another book. That experience whetted her appetite for book writing and publishing, so over a year ago she started helping Dave with the myriad number of tasks that must be done to get a book to the publisher. Like me, KittyHawk is retired. Unlike me, her idea of a diversion is not watching several seasons of Robin Hood! She loves a project that challenges and teaches her something new. Helping with Columbine has fulfilled that need for her. Dave's appreciation of her assistance is pretty evident in the acknowledgements for Columbine. He writes:

"Lydia Wells Sledge stands alone. She devoted a year of her life to serve as
full-time unpaid reader, proofer, fact checker,researcher,organizer,assistant,
and tackler of every conceivable odd task. She claims to have
enjoyed it."

One great perk for all her help with the book was to be invited to a taping of an Oprah show observing the 10th anniversary of the Columbine massacre. Columbine had just been published in early April and was getting a lot of attention and favorable reviews. Dave asked her and several members of his family to fly to Chicago on April 15 for the show--with guarantees of good seats! Of course we were all excited for her, but, more importantly, we wanted the lowdown on the behind the scenes action at an Oprah show. Here's KittyHawk's (in fuschia sweater with Dave's family) first hand report so you'll know what to expect if you ever go:

• Wednesday I had my alarm set for 4:45 am. At 4:30 the closet
  door fell out of the frame in the guest room. So I was up in plenty of
  time to drive to Louisville to catch my flight to Chicago.
• I was worried about getting from O'Hare to Harpo Studio and back again. Peggy, one of Dave's six sisters, invited me to meet up with the family members in the American Airlines terminal and travel downtown with them. Problem solved!
• Met up with Dave's mom and dad, five of his six sisters and two brothers at about 11:00 to stand in the line at Harpo while the audience for the first taping let out.
• Once inside, the standing continued. There was a coat check and then we were all checked off as the "Cullen party". At the point we got a blue form on which to sign our life away! Then it's on to a purse check where I had to surrender my book (Run by Ann Patchett), cell phone. Other people had ball point pens and even eyebrow pencils confiscated. Who knew?
• Next, we headed upstairs to sit with 322 other people who are attended the same taping.
• As you might guess, in a room filled with mostly women and a handful of men there were only six restroom stalls for women. Not enough because you were told you wouldn't be excused once in the studio. What's with this, Oprah?
• We had no idea what was going on with Dave and the other guests in the green room. He later said that it was pretty intense.
• The head crowd control person finally ushered the Cullen party of 12 into the semi-circular studio and into some really good seats. Eyeball to eyeball view of the stage!
• There was an extra seat next to me for the fellow who "does hair". I quizzed him on a lot of things. He doesn't do Oprah's hair. There's a full time Oprah hair dresser and make-up artist. We could all use a team like that. Those two guys came out several times during segment breaks to be sure Oprah was perfectly arranged.
• From getting in line to seated in the studio it was probably close to two hours. Which would explain my slight impatience with the warm up and welcome. Who had traveled the furthest to attend the show (Northern Ireland, Australia for show and visit friends), birthday? warm climate? I was astonished at what people were willing to share. Guess they feel that close to Oprah.
• Next came the commercial! Freddie, another Oprah person, came onstage. She told us about the Oprah store and how great it was. I was afraid we'd be lined up and made to go through the store and shop, but they missed that opportunity. They did go through the inventory and had models come out sporting Oprah stuff. People were going "Ohhhh! That's so Chanel!"I might have sprung for a key chain. Talk about commercial. Talk about merchandising. Talk about cash cow! I'm getting cynical by now. . .
• After the shopping commercial, stage managers and prop handlers arranged the stage and set the cameras--nine in all. Amazing amount of attention paid to even the most minute detail--a water glass might be moved a centimeter. Cameras and lighting was carefully checked for each chair on the stage.
• By now it was about 1:20pm. All of a sudden the energy level in the room changed. I figured O was coming out. Cameras moved and the lights went up. But no! Dave came bounding out on stage laughing like he was having the time of his life. Then the lights got brighter and the energy level really went higher, people stood and cheered and O came out. She shook hands with Dave and sat down in the other chair.
• But first the shoes weren't right. They were much too glittery for her beige pantsuit (Wonder why she can wear beige and the audience can't? We were told no beige, wear bright solid colors.) So immediately out came another pair of shoes. Much better. Beige platforms with heels at least 4 inches tall.
• So she started chatting informally with Dave. We heard him ask where he should look, into which camera, and she grabbed him and said "Look at me. You are having this conversation with me!"
• The actual taping is done in segments and then edited into a continuous program. O first talked with Dave, then Kate Battan (lead investigator for Columbine) joined them. Then Dwayne Fuselier (FBI psychologist and hostage negotiator who provided the most revealing profiles of the killers) joined them. Between segments O talked to the audience, but because of the topic understandably there was not a lot of hooting and hollering "YOU get a car and YOU get a car!"
• There were large monitors overhead, not to mention the giant one behind the stage where we could see the "b-roll", I think it's called--the photos and videos taped in Littleton, the memorials to the kids who died, and the Skyped-in version of Mr. D, the principal of Columbine High School.
• I won't go into the program itself. You can see on TV (note about that later).
• O got down from her chair, picked her shoes up, someone asked what size, she said 11, and poof she was gone.
• We exited the studio "in an orderly fashion" and reclaimed our confiscated belongings. Everything about the "Oprah Experience" was very controlled. We got a copy of Columbine, but I found out that Oprah gives away NOTHING. Any giveaways come from the publisher, manufacturer or advertiser. I probably knew this, but it always seems like it's Oprah who's giving away the stuff.
• We all walked to a nearby restaurant for drinks, photos, and book signings. Cary, the publicist for Twelve, Dave's publisher, announced that Columbine would be debuting at #7 on the New York Times bestseller list the following week!
• My flight left about a minute early. I found my car, drove home, changed my shoes, took out the garbage, and went to bed. A memorable day for sure!

Well, now you know whether it's worth the effort to attend your favorite TV show taping. A downer was the decision to not show the program on Columbine. Cullen was contacted by the Harpo Studio producers soon after the taping and was told that, regretfully, they had made the decision to not air the show. It was feared that it might be perceived as recognition of the killers. And on the 10th anniversary, it was decided that any public commemorations should be for the victims and survivors.

I hope you will read Columbine. We all need to understand better why these tragedies occur and what we can do to prevent them in the future. Columbine may be that tool that we need.

(Photo Credits: Magazine cover--photographer Ruven Afanador; Oprah Show Stage--promotional video at Oprah.com)