About Me

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Recent retiree--35 year's experience teaching reading, English, adult basic education and volunteer leadership skills. Started this blog to exchange ideas and commentary with friends and others having an interest in joining the discussions. Greatest life accomplishments include: 1.organized my 3rd grade class to check out library books for me to get around librarian's weekly limit--Amazon.com, the Mullins Elementary 3rd Grade Class of 1956 is still waiting for "thank you" notes; 2. volunteered in the Peace Corps, island of St. Kitts, West Indies; 3.taught adults to read, earn their GEDs., and speak English as a second language; 4. bought a border collie puppy for $6, got evicted rather than give him up, and began a life-long love affair with all things "Dog"; 5. joined a physical fitness boot camp in my mid-50s--don't mess with someone who's been doing regulation pushups in wet grass at 5:30 a.m.; 6. walked across Northern England with best friend Sally--over 80 miles from the Irish to North Seas; and 7. travelled to many foreign countries for pleasure and work.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Ungrateful Jewish Grandmother

(Our hostesses for this week's Fun Monday are Margaret and Stephanie over at Mamadrama . They want us to share a funny, trivial fact that we remember even though we probably should have forgotten it a long time ago. Well-l-l, most of the time my mind is filled with trivia, funny and not so funny. This week, however, I couldn't come up with a single good example. So, I'll tell you my best Jewish grandmother joke. It's been a favorite for about 40 years.)

I loved the northeastern boys that came to my college in eastern Kentucky in the 60s to escape the high tuition and, probably, the more stringent college entrance requirements of states like New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island. They had names like Levy, Nusbaum or Ackermann. In contrast to the local guys, they lived off campus in dumps that we loved to get invited to on the weekend and drove junk heaps that no self respecting southern boy would be caught in, dead or alive. In contrast to the common Scots-Irish, English faces on campus, these guys had the dark hair, prominent features (translate big noses) and dark complexions of their eastern European ancestors. They loved the southern girls because we were pretty and sweet--or at least pretended to be. We loved them right back because they were so different from the usual fare.

I was lucky enough to live with Coach Hamilton's family for four years of college. Coach Hamilton was very popular with the northern boys because he coached the Morehead State University baseball team and also pitched for the New York Yankees. Northern boys love baseball, especially the New York Yankees, and welcomed a chance to sit at Coach Hamilton's kitchen table with the family, sharing some good southern home cooked meals, baseball stories, and Jewish humor. This was my introduction to Jewish humor with it's play on the insecurities and foibles of a people who used humor to tell their stories of family persecution and survival. My appreciation for Jewish humor grew when I had an opportunity to hear some of the great comedians live in New York and New Jersey where we spent our summers.

Somewhere along the way I heard this Jewish grandmother joke that never fails to make me laugh. In fact, I can't get to the punch line without cracking up, but here goes:

A little Jewish grandmother is sitting on the beach at the Jersey shore in one of those legless beach chairs. She's wearing a new flowered one piecer with clever slenderizing shirring across the tummy. Her freshly done hairdo is protected by a big hat. She has a big aluminum sun reflector propped on her tummy to capture the rays.

Her only grandson is playing in the sand by her feet. Lo and behold, this HUGE wave
washes in and carries the boy straight out to sea!

Grandmother Yetel heaves herself out of the no-legged beach chair and raises her arms
to the sky in supplication. "Oh Lord! Help! What will I tell my daughter-in-law has happened to our only grandchild?"

In answer to her plea, another HUGE wave washes on shore and deposits the boy and his sand pail right back at Grandmother Yetel's feet. She looks at the boy and then turns a sad eye to the heavens again, saying in an aggrieved voice, "He had a hat."

Bonus Joke:

What Mona Lisa's mother probably said on viewing Da Vinci's painting of her: "With what your father paid for braces, you could have tried a little harder with that smile."

Well, that's it for trivial humor for me tonight. Head on over to the other Fun Monday spots to fill your head with lots more fun trivia facts so you'll be the hit of your next social gathering.


Jeanna said...

Very funny, great photo. It reminds me of Brain Candy when the grandchild floats away with a bunch of balloons on granny's watch.

IamwhoIam said...

I see few of us can play be the rules. Oh I forgot there are no rules for FM.

thanks for the smile.

Jo Beaufoix said...

Hee hee, 'He had a hat.'

iPost said...

Great jokes! Grandma Yetel. Love it!

Hootin' Anni said...

Too good!!

Loved this Fun Monday. Mine is posted. Hopefully this is a bit on the 'FUNny side' too. Drop by if you can, won't you? Happy day to you.

Karmyn R said...

hahaha - good joke.

Dreaming What Ifs...

Sandy said...

favorite Jewish joke: How can you be sure that Jesus was a Jew?

He lived at home till He was 30, went into His Father's business, and His mom thought He was God.

Thanks for reminding me of this.

Ari_1965 said...

Made me laugh.

Ari_1965 said...

I'm late putting up my Fun Monday, but here it is: Here's my Fun Monday post

ChrisB said...

Very good LOL

Sauntering Soul said...

Hysterical! I'm going to share that with the Jewish attorney across the hall from me right now. He has a great sense of humor and since he makes fun of me being Southern almost daily I'm going to get him back today!

lisaschaos said...

I love the jokes! You done good. :)

Margaret said...

Love the photo and the jokes.... Thanks for playing!

TxGambit said...

Too cute. I am part Jewish and love the jokes... It is like the best part of being Jewish. :)

Pamela said...

what a wonderful blog -- I knew a couple of those ladies and I can just hear that sentiment in my head.

Beckie said...

Love it!

I can only imagine the draw to those Northern boys.....

Alison said...

too funny Faye...thanks for sharing!!

Faye said...

Okay, here's two more Jewish mother jokes:

Albert Einstein's Jewish mother says: "But it's your senior photograph! Couldn't you have done something about your hair?"

Even better:

A Jewish man calls his mother in Florida "Mom, and how are you?"

Mom: "Not so good. I've been very weak."

Son: "Why are you so weak?"

Mom: "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."

Son: "Mama, that's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?"

Mom: "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call."

kitten said...

Very Funny!
It was nice to hear from you!
and yes, Topper is a border collie. 100%! Lol!

hulagirlatheart said...

Very, very funny!

KittyHawk said...

I might like the one about not eating in 38 days even better than the "He had a hat." Or maybe it's just that I haven't heard it as many times. I first heard you tell the hat joke in 1975, and It still cracks me up, too.

Ali said...

always good to start a Monday with a laugh. Thanks

Swampwitch said...

I love that photo. She reminds me of my Mam-ma!
The story is classic.